The Heraldy Press

An Irishwoman living in the village of Ernsk, a small hamlet just meters from the magnetic North Pole, is preparing herself for the area’s worst snowstorm since earlier this afternoon. Olivia Hannon (that’s not her in the accompanying photo, it’s some other lady having an oul’ laugh in the snow), an 84-year-old native of County Longford, is at risk of losing her home, a two-bedroom mansion situated in a tree behind the village’s only bar/restaurant, The Freezin’ Kip. The thrice-divorced Olivia moved to the region in the mid ’80s in search of love (‘All the nice lads in Longford were either married, emigrating, elderly or from Roscommon’, she says), and stayed. Just after both of the town’s locals finished watching tape-delayed footage of Dennis Taylor’s 1985 Snooker World Championship Final win this morning, the area witnessed almost 11 feet of snow fall, beating the previous day’s record by almost four inches. Homes, livestock and possessions are in danger of being lost, and the bar’s beer garden may also be forced to close after lunch for an hour or two.

An Irishwoman living in the village of Ernsk, a small hamlet just meters from the magnetic North Pole, is preparing herself for the area’s worst snowstorm since earlier this afternoon. Olivia Hannon (that’s not her in the accompanying photo, it’s some other lady having an oul’ laugh in the snow), an 84-year-old native of County Longford, is at risk of losing her home, a two-bedroom mansion situated in a tree behind the village’s only bar/restaurant, The Freezin’ Kip. The thrice-divorced Olivia moved to the region in the mid ’80s in search of love (‘All the nice lads in Longford were either married, emigrating, elderly or from Roscommon’, she says), and stayed. Just after both of the town’s locals finished watching tape-delayed footage of Dennis Taylor’s 1985 Snooker World Championship Final win this morning, the area witnessed almost 11 feet of snow fall, beating the previous day’s record by almost four inches. Homes, livestock and possessions are in danger of being lost, and the bar’s beer garden may also be forced to close after lunch for an hour or two.

A heavy metal fan, last week some time.

A self-described ‘metal head’ from County Longford is said to be in mourning, following the tragic passing of rock icon Lenny, from Radiohead. Declan Flavin (29), with an address that made little sense to the trained eye, claimed to have over 40 hard rock songs on his iPod, and when his brother gives him back his Dire Straits “Sultans of Swing” tape, that total will edge towards 51, once he figures out how to get cassettes onto his laptop. “I’ve been into metal and rock since this weeks, but sure, Black Sabbath or the Deaf Leopards, they never tour the Irish midlands, so I gave artists who do play that easy listening oul’ country shite a chance first, as them oul bollockses do be always playing the halls around here, so they are, like”. When told of the tragic passing of Lemmy, from Motorhead, Flavin corrected us and said that it was Lenny; “Sure what’s Lemmy short for, Lembert? Cop on, would yeh?”